Tag Archives: baseball

The San Diego Padres Are Officially The Best At Being The Worst


After getting swept by the Dodgers and shutout in all three games the San Diego Padres are the first team in the 100+ year history of Major League Baseball to be shut out in 3 straight games to open a season. The previous record was 26 consecutive scoreless innings by the St. Louis Cardinals to open the 1943 campaign (those Cardinals incidently went on to win 105 games, but thats irrelevant in our case). This comes fresh on the heals of their 15-0 Opening Day fiasco, which is now the most lopsided shutout in MLB Opening Day history. The previous record holder you ask? The Pittsburgh Pirates trounced the Cincinnati Reds 14-0 pm Opening Day…in 1911. 105 fucking years ago. This is just poor baseball.

This weekend the Padres head to Denver for the Rockies home opener. If they can not sonehow, someway scratch a few runs across in Coors Field this weekend I nominate the Padres for relegation. Send the entire organization to El Paso and call up the Chihuahuas to San Diego. Make the Padres earn their way back to Major Leagues because they definitely dont deserve to be there. I’ve joked for years that the Padres are a Quadruple A baseball team but this is worse than Quadruple A. Im not even sure this is Triple A level baseball.

I didnt expect the Padres to be any good in 2016, but this? This is flat out unacceptable. Silver lining is that there should be plenty of good seats available this year.

Padres Sign Joaquin Benoit For Some Reason

The last time the world saw Joaquin Benoit

CBS Sports – The Padres and right-handed reliever Joaquin Benoit have agreed to a two-year contract, reports Jon Heyman of CBSSports.com. The deal is worth $15.5 million and is pending a physical.

I just dont understand this move. $15.5mil over 2yrs for a 36 year old 8th inning guy? I would imagine Houston Street is still pitching the 9th but thats the same kind of money that Baltimore just gave Grant Balfour.  This move makes me believe the Padres are trying to set themselves up to trade Houston Street at some point this season.  Given Street’s steady track record and relative lack of injuries it would make sense for the Pads to hold onto Street until the July 31st  Non-Waiver Trade Deadline when there are always a few contenders willing to overpay for a quality bullpen arm, let alone a quality closer heading into a close pennant race.  Benoit was eminently hittable last year with Detroit in their clusterfuck of a Closer situation and the last memory anyone has of him is when Big Papi was rattling the city of Boston to life with an 8th inning Grand Slam in the ALCS off one of his fastballs.  While I agree spending money is a positive thing it is way more crucial to spend that money correctly (see: Cubs, Chicago; Mets, New York; Angels of Anaheim, Los Angeles; Phillies, Philadelphia) but it is nice to see the Padres are at least trying to put a competitive team in that beautiful little downtown ballpark.

MLB Hot Stove Recap


I’m going to do a little MLB Post Boston Red Sox 2013 World Series Championship Recap since I know most people get all wrapped up in football and the holidays this time of year and tend to forget baseball exists. Well not me and especially not this year. This is just a cursory recap of what I deam important moves with a little of my input thrown in for good measure. Winter Meetings are in Orlando this week and I suspect there are some big trades coming in the next few days.

~Robinson Cano gets $240mil over 10yrs from the Seattle Mariners

~Prince shipped to Texas for Kinsler.  Miguel Cabrerra did NOT handle the break up Prince getting traded well at all:

image.adapt.320.mediumMiguel-Cabrera-Expresses-How-Much-He-Will-Miss-Prince-Fielder-on-Twitter-Bleacher-Report Miguel-Cabrera-Expresses-How-Much-He-Will-Miss-Prince-Fielder-on-Twitter-Bleacher-Report-1Jesus Christ dude, you won a Triple Crown and an MVP. Get your shit together.

~ C AJ Pierzinski, RP Mujica sign with the Red Sox
Nap Time and his beard also make a return to The World Champs with a 2yr deal

mike napoli shirtless boston

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Bobby Cano to the Mariners. No, Really the Seattle Mariners

baristaScoured the interwebs for a pic of a pretty girl in a Mariner’s shirt or hat.  This is what I’m posting. I’ll let you do the math.  Get your shit together Seattle, you’re still technically part of the West Coast.

Not sure if Hova is the best or worst agent in baseball right now because yes he did get a team to  pony up $240 mil over 10yrs for Bobby Cano, but that team is the SEATTLE MARINERS.  Not exactly on the verge of winning a World Series in the near future in the Emerald City.  I understand that the kid is a tremendously talented player and all but that kind of scratch for a 29yr old 2B that has a tendency to lollygag around the diamond from time to time is a HUGE gamble for a franchise that is in no way financially capable of surviving this deal blowing up in their face. The Yankees can print their own currency and look what AFraud’s quaterbillion dollar albatross is doing to the Bombers. No chance Seattle could survive the fallout of this deal going bust.
That being said I feel like King Felix Hernandez is grinning ear to ear right now. Can’t knock the M’s for at least going out and spending in an attempt to reward King Felix for his loyalty to the franchise. If I was a Mariner’s fan I would love this move, as an impartial observer I don’t hate the move. I get what Seattle is trying to do and I respect the hell out of them for being ballsy enough to spend some loot in an attempt at closing the gap in the AL West and not potentially waste the career of one of the game’s best arms.  Although Cano’s power numbers should drop quite a bit in the mosoleum he’ll now be calling home in Safeco Field.

marinersRIP919Mariner’s Baseball!

PS –

I get that Robinson Cano has roughly 240 million reasons he could name as to why Seattle and I respect that.  But this is the kind of move you make when you just want to play baseball and be filthy rich and have zero interest in winning.  Nothing wrong with that, just have to acknowledge it.  Unless he signed with Seattle because Jesus Montero got sent to the Pac North West from the Bronx in the Joel Pineda deal.

Potential for LLWS Title Game Between Chula and TJ


If you don’t follow the Little League World Series I’m not even sure of what to say to you.  Its like the greatest piece of throwback Americana we have left. Just awesome stuff all over the place in Williamsport, PA.  Lets be real it’s literally the only reason the overwhelming majority of people even realize that a town called Williamsport exists. But I’m not here today to talk about all that.  No today I want to talk about the potential for a dream LLWS Title Game, California vs Mexico.

The team from California has already secured their spot in the US Championship Game and at 1pm PST today Thursday 22AUG)  the kids from team Mexico battle it out with Panama, winner goes on to the International Championship Game where Japan awaits.  Today I am 100% on the side of team Mexico because this is where things get real interesting.  California is represented by East Lake Chula Vista Little League, Mexico is represented by Tijuana Little League.  For those of you not lucky enough to live in this amazing little corner of the continent below is a map:


The green A is East Lake Chula Vista, just south of San Diego, the green B in Tijuana, directly on the other side of the border fence.  If the kids from Chula Vista can just get through the winner of the Washington vs Connecticut game and Tijuana can get through Panama and upset the Japanese (Japan is the only team to beat a powerhouse Mexican side) then we get the dream LLWS Championship Game of Tijuana, Mexico vs Chula Vista, California (basically the nice part of Mexico) and it would most likely go down as the switch-bladeiest game in LLWS history.  Can’t wait.  Today we are all Tijuana (I need penicillin after writing that)

LLWSMILFOh ya, there are also the Trophy MILFs

I Hate ARod But You Have To Respect This Move

Look lets be clear: I am a diehard 100% unabashed Red Sox fan.  I hate Alex Rodriguez.  I want him thrown out of baseball for life.  The fact he gets to play while appealing his suspension and affect a pennant race is beyond ludicrous.  I love Dempster throwing at him FOUR times in one AB and the fact that Dumpster will serve his suspension before ARod is kind of confusing. I could not be more excited to know that all ARod has ever wanted is approval from baseball and now he will NEVER make the HOF.  I love MLB clearly singling him out for persecution.

All of that being said I absolutely have to respect the balls it takes to choose JayZ and Kanye’s “Niggas in Paris” as the song you walk out to for the 1st AB in New Yankee Stadium post Sox series.  Maybe this is when ARod embraces his role as the villain, well at least until Selig finally gets to burn him at the stake.

Just as a reminder this is how the first six lines of that little ditty go:

“So I ball so hard muhfuckas wanna find me
first niggas gotta find me
What’s 50 grand to a muhfucka like me
Can you please remind me?
Ball so hard, this shit crazy
Y’all don’t know that don’t shit phase me”

Nothing in this world more dangerous than a man with absolutely nothing to lose and more than enough cash to hire the most cut-throat, mafioso lawyers NYC has to offer.  Lord knows I hate him but goddamn if I can’t respect that type of hustle. Tiger Woods should be taking notes.

TigerWoods“Mafia Lawyers! Why didn’t I think of that?”



The Washington Nationals are currently feeling the wrath of their own hubris.  Last year, with the best record in the Bigs, they shut down stud Ace Stephen Strasburg to “protect” their golden goose.  The very same golden goose they rushed to the majors in the midst of a lost season all in the name of turning a quick buck only to blow out his elbow.  So they shut down a grown man who had the capability of pitching the franchise deep into October and got appropriately bounced in the NLDS.  They did all this operating under the idea that “this team is so good and young, we’ll be back next year”.  What the Nats failed to account for, some fucking how, is that baseball is a long and difficult season.  A million different things can go wrong at any given time.  The fact that they felt they could toss away a legitimate chance at a World Championship because they would easily return to the post season has apparently angered the Baseball Gods.  The Nats are looking bad this year.  And it’s not just that they are losing games but it’s how their losing games.  The pitching, Strasburg I’m looking at you big guy, is a mess.  The formerly untouchable bullpen is now very touchable.  They can’t field the ball and just seem out of sorts.  Very reminiscent of last years Red Sox.  They always say that pride comes before the fall, and the Washington Nationals seem to be proof positive that the Baseball Gods are a vengeful, spiteful, Old Testament Fire and Brimstone-type bunch. Take note and act accordingly.